You know my story, but you won't understand the feelings behind it

Just how much can one person change after one moment?

How much have I changed behind this wall?

How much more am I changing?

Why am I changing?

"All those crazy things you said; All those crazy things we did. Didn't think about it just went with it."

♥

I hate myself for not letting go; I hate myself for falling in so deeply; I hate myself for not having what I can't have; I hate myself for those mistakes we've made that will hurt her; I hate myself for being unreasonable; I hate myself for making myself feel bad; I hate myself for confusing my own self; Most importantly- I hate myself for being myself.

Love you too deeply

Made those mistakes; killed myself with it

&My love will hurt either her or myself

I'm a sinner- I believe I will get my karma one day when I least expected it to come back haunting me.

How do I go on protecting my heart?